Chapter 3: Princess Anna and Her Ken

Samantha could hear the Barbie's high-pitched voice ringing all the way down the hall as she approached the parlor. "Anna, walk faster! Stand up straighter! Ken, don't slouch!"

Samantha glanced at Rodney. He seemed to be trying to blend in with the wallpaper. At last, the door flew open, and there she stood, her blond hair frizzed out like a lion mane, her silver miniskirt glinting in the morning sun that peered nervously through the parlor window. She waved her knife contemptuously at them. "What frumpy clothing," she said to no one in particular. Then she shoved Princess Anna into the room ahead of her. "No one make any sudden moves or this girl gets it."

Anna, who seemed more annoyed than frightened by the situation, merely rolled her eyes and moved further away from the Barbie and her random knife-waving. "Hello, King Rodney, Princess Samantha, Princess Carrie." Anna was as polite as her father. "May I introduce Tiffany, the leader of the Barbies. She has a proposal for a peaceful resolution to our little ... um... ownership dispute."

"All of your stuff is mine!" said the Barbie. "Mine, mine, mine!"

"Well ... erm ... surely, a compromise of some sort can be reached," Rodney mumbled. "While we are not opposed to providing you with certain necessities ..."

"Silence, fool!" Tiffany swung the knife around so that the blade wavered menacingly an inch from Rodney's rather prodigious nose.

For an instant, Rodney turned pale as his eyes focused on the sharp edge. Then,"I say, are those real rubies in that knife handle?" he said with fascination.

The Barbie's fierce eyes suddenly softened. "Of course," she said proudly. "And look!" She flipped it over. "Diamond on the other side."

"Intriguing!" Rodney said. "May I say, Madam, your bracelet is also truly stunning. Such perfect color coordination with the knife."

They stared at each other.

"You are wearing silk," Tiffany said.

"The finest," Rodney replied proudly. He held up his arm. "And look ... pearl buttons!"

"Oh, pu-leeze," said Anna, rolling her eyes. "If I hear one more thing about ..."

"Ken!" said the Barbie sharply. Both the Kens jumped. "No, not you two," she said impatiently. "I'm talking to that one!"

"My name is Rodney," said Rodney.

"Whatever." Tiffany waved her hand. "I think I can talk to you, Ken. Is there somewhere we can speak that is away from these ..." She wrinkled her nose. "...these silly creatures and their cotton frocks?"

"We could go to my office," said Rodney. "I have a lovely collection of tie-clips in there."

"Lead the way, Ken," the Barbie replied.

"Oh, thank heavens!" Anna breathed a sigh of relief as the sharp click of the Barbie's heels disappeared up the stairs. "That woman is intolerable. I thought I was going to scream if I had to listen to her squeaky voice one more second."

"Anna! The Kens can hear you," Carrie whispered urgently, eyeing the two men that were wandering aimlessly around the back part of the parlor, randomly picking up shiny objects and looking at them.

"Oh, don't mind them," Anna sighed. "Besides, one of them is mine. The one on the left."

"How can you tell them apart?" Samantha asked doubtfully.

"The Barbies gave me a defective one," Anna said. "They want to assimilate people and make them part of the Barbie tribe. They thought if they gave me a Ken to marry, I'd settle in. But they don't like me very much, so they gave me the one that was hit by a wagon a few months back. He has never been right since the accident. If you look close, you can see that he looks a little flattened, and his arms and legs tend to fall off once in a while."

As if on cue, Ken's left arm suddenly slipped down his sleeve and fell to the carpet with a soft thunk. He didn't even seem to notice.

"Ken!" Anna said sharply. "Pull yourself together!"

The man jumped and picked up his arm and pushed it back into his sleeve. The girls heard a soft click as it popped back in place. Then he went back to peering at his reflection in a metal button on a sofa cushion.

"He doesn't seem very bright, does he?" Carrie said. "Was he hit in the head by the wagon as well?"

"No," Anna said. "They are all like that. But he really isn't so bad once you get to know him." She eyed him thoughtfully. "I'm not saying that I really want to marry him. But he is sweet in his own way."

"What does Tiffany want to talk to Rodney about?" Samantha asked a little anxiously, glancing up the stairs.

"Well, they are hoping to avoid a battle," Anna said.

"That's good," Carrie put in. "They must not be as savage and bloodthirsty as King Darrell believed."

"Oh, it has nothing to do with wanting to avoid a fight," Anna said. "They have found that wars often destroy a lot of good clothes and furniture. By the time the fighting is over, there is sometimes little left of the nation's resources. Tiffany and Prissy consulted with some of the other top Barbies and decided that this time they would try to reach an non-aggression agreement in exchange for the right to take what they want of Aldervia's finest possessions."

"Well, perhaps that is good news," Samantha said. "We can supply the Barbies with a few things they want and they will be on their way."

Anna shook her head grimly. "I'm afraid not. The Barbies are inherently greedy. I do not think they will honor their agreement. In the end, they will not leave until they have stripped Aldervia of everything it owns."

"Then we must fight them!" Samantha declared.

Anna shook her head again, glancing with brief annoyance at her Ken in the corner who had lost interest in the button and was now solemnly tossing his left arm up into the air and catching it with his right. "You are badly outnumbered here," she said. "And you have no idea how vicious they are."

"Then there is no hope?" said Carrie in a forlorn whisper. "What ever shall we do, Anna?"

"I wish I could give you some good counsel," Anna replied. "But I'm afraid I have none. There is nothing to be done."

In the corner, her Ken paused, still holding his left arm in his right hand. "You know, Anna, my sweet," he said, "the Barbies cannot fight without their spiky shoes." And then he went back to his game.

After a brief pause, Samantha opened her mouth to say something, but just then, they all heard the click of Barbie heels. They turned and saw Tiffany making her way down the stairs. She had a triumphant expression.

Rodney followed behind her, beaming a bright smile at Carrie and Samantha.

"Good news, cousins!" he called out. "We have surrendered!"

Next chapter: The Escape